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I can never remember a time growing up when mom wasn’t busy working around the house.  Whether she was out mowing our ½ acre lot with a push mower, raking leaves, tending her vegetable garden or sewing and crocheting making clothes for me, my sister and my dolls; she has always been a very active and fiercely independent woman.  Dad, of course, was there too but he took a more leisurely approach.

As the years rolled along, I could see mom begin to slow down, the gardens got smaller and with the on-set of essential tremors, she gradually had to give up her beloved sewing and crocheting altogether. 

With last year’s extended stay in the hospital from complications of congestive heart failure my sister and I felt it was time for some candid discussions about our concerns for her; actually for both of them.  With both being in their 80’s and with their health concerns we suggested perhaps senior housing might be the best plan at this point.

Of course mom wasn’t hearing any of it.  Yes, she had plans alright and that meant staying put in her own home.  Dad didn’t care either way.  Her doctors gave us the ok for her return home; after all, she had proved to them that she was able to keep up with a workout regimen during her extended stay consisting of daily hall walks and using her bicycle wheel for leg strengthening.

Before she came home my sister and I decided that we should focus on making their home safer and more “user friendly” for their current needs.  Luckily it’s a single story structure so outside of a couple of steps up into the home, stairs wasn’t going to be an issue.  We removed all of their throw rugs.  I bought some of the rubber kitchen grabbers for use with opening jars along with a one touch can opener, they work great.  We also moved her heavier kitchen items to lower cabinets to prevent her from having to reach for something heavy.  We moved the lighter items to the higher cabinets but got an extendable grabber stick.  Dad can use the stick.

In the bathroom we replaced their stationery shower head with a hand-held one and added a bath safe transfer bench on the tub along with a grab bar.  We also installed a commode assist with arms on their toilet seat to make getting up and down easier for her.

I know we didn’t do everything we could have and I know their situation will continue to change, but for now mom is happy knowing she has retained her independence by staying in her home.  And if mom is happy then dad is happy.  As for my sister and I, we take pride in knowing we were able to help them keep that independence with a few tweaks that made their home more adaptable and comfortable for this time of their life.